Equality for colour-blind people

For hundreds of years the classification of ‘red’ and ‘green’ colours has discriminated against sincere colour-blind people, the government claims. In a long-overdue move supported by the majority of the British public, David Cameron is taking a bold step forward in redefining ‘orange’ to embrace the categories formerly known as ‘red’ and ‘green’.

Speaking outside parliament today Mr Cameron declared, “We have to admit we overlooked this issue in our election manifesto and in the coalition agreement, but with hundreds of red-green colour-blind people facing discrimination we felt we had to act to redress an age-old inequality.” Mr Cameron refuted suggestions that this was an unnecessary and damaging act which was merely a decoy as the government has resoundingly failed in every substantive economic decision it has made over the last 2 years. He also denied claims that this was a cynical job-creation scheme for civil servants who would now have to redraft millions of documents to account for the reclassification.

“This is entirely in keeping with our New Conservative agenda. This is the New Speak our foreparents were denied,” he insisted.

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